Sumana

Mostly here to listen because we have a few people in our social sphere who are similarly nervous. Often it stems from trauma and just takes *a lot of time* for people to understand it's okay to ask and you really mean it when they say something is acceptable or even encouraged. I'd say that the job you've taken on as a host is not to guarantee someone will be comfortable, but to offer the things you can for their comfort. I like the idea of getting a more chill cohost who has additional bandwidth to do some of the emotional work here in talking to folks with this level of anxiety. I absolutely agree there's a point where someone has to name the pattern if a person's worries are dominating the conversation. Someone with this level of anxiety may not be in a position to take that feedback well, but it doesn't mean you shouldn't name it. It does mean speaking separately to them about it might be helpful if it's possible-- it may not be if they're a first timer and things are at a point where you need to redirect things to allow others to enjoy the event.