Hello, I get that nervous, and I don't like it in myself, either.
Things that help: ignore the self-deprecation and move on with the conversation, same with the "is it ok?" double checks. "Yep, that's ok, help yourself to anything," then move on. That is an annoying thing I do but only figure out later what was happening.
When the anxiety is taking over the flow of conversation, redirect the topic rather than leave someone stuck dealing with the anxiety. The anxiety is going to happen, and the host should be saving other guests from it rather than attending to the anxious person, who is most likely anxious about the whole situation rather than a specific thing that can be addressed. You'll know you're doing it right when they come back another time.
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branchandroot
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Date: 2024-12-07 04:05 am (UTC)Things that help: ignore the self-deprecation and move on with the conversation, same with the "is it ok?" double checks. "Yep, that's ok, help yourself to anything," then move on. That is an annoying thing I do but only figure out later what was happening.
When the anxiety is taking over the flow of conversation, redirect the topic rather than leave someone stuck dealing with the anxiety. The anxiety is going to happen, and the host should be saving other guests from it rather than attending to the anxious person, who is most likely anxious about the whole situation rather than a specific thing that can be addressed. You'll know you're doing it right when they come back another time.