feeling upset

[brainwane]

I feel upset about the riot in DC yesterday. I am struggling to find words for how upset I am.

They defiled my temple.

They damaged and compromised physical things, which will have to be replaced and repaired, and who's going to have to pay for that? Me, the taxpayer.

Also, a bunch of people will catch COVID-19 from this. More waste, more death.

I'm underslept, and I'm perhaps still too shocked to be truly as angry and sad as I am going to be.

Comments

[watersword]

Yeah. I can't access any real feelings beyond shocked-but-not-surprised.

[kass]

Yes to this. All of it.

[brendn]

Me too, and me too.

[emceeaich]

I see you and yes, angry that so many of those horrid people and their enablers will avoid responsibility.

I am keeping an eye out for some locals who I think would have been there so we can try to hold them accountable here at home.

[jesse_the_k]

It hasn't sunk in yet -- I feel quite detached. But then I did wake up at 2am and doom scrolled the metafilter thread.

[eirias]

I kept crying-but-not-crying yesterday, with tearless sobs. It felt like dry heaving sorrow.

[naomikritzer]

I've been feeling sort of numb and distant from it all day and I think it's actually because I'm aware of just how much worse it could have been and my brain is routing around my capacity for imagining the House Democrats being lined up and shot on a livestream.

[cuddyclothes]

Yesterday I was dazed and couldn't concentrate. There is a lump of sorry in my stomach. I want to cry, but for some reason it's harder to access than my rage.

I posted about my mental state on Facebook and a lot of folks replied to say they felt the same way too.

[swingandswirl]

/hugs you very gently/

My heart was breaking from horror-shock-fury, and I'm not even American. I'm just so, so glad it wasn''t worse.